Buying an engagement ring is one of the most significant purchases in a person’s life. It represents love, commitment, and the beginning of a lifelong journey together. However, when it comes to how much you should spend on an engagement ring, opinions vary widely. Some believe in traditional spending rules, such as the three-month salary rule, while others argue that personal financial circumstances should take precedence.
In this article, we will explore the X-rule for buying an engagement ring, whether the three-month salary rule still applies in 2025, and how to find the best engagement ring within your budget without compromising on quality or style.
I. The Traditional "Three-Month Salary Rule" – Does It Still Apply?
For decades, many people have followed the three-month salary rule, which suggests that you should spend three months’ worth of income on an engagement ring.
1.1 The Origin of the Three-Month Salary Rule
- The three-month rule originated from a 1940s De Beers advertising campaign that encouraged men to spend at least one month’s salary on a diamond ring.
- Over time, this rule increased to two months and then three months, largely due to marketing strategies rather than practical financial advice.
1.2 Does It Still Make Sense Today?
In today’s economy, spending three months' salary on a ring may not be financially realistic for everyone. Here’s why:
- Inflation and Rising Living Costs – With the high cost of rent, student loans, and daily expenses, saving three months’ salary for a ring may not be practical.
- Changing Social Norms – Modern couples are breaking away from traditional norms, prioritizing travel, home ownership, or wedding expenses over an extravagant ring.
- Customization and Alternatives – There are now many ways to get high-quality engagement rings at more affordable prices, such as lab-grown diamonds, moissanite, and alternative gemstones.
1.3 What Do People Actually Spend on Engagement Rings?
According to recent surveys:
- The average engagement ring cost in the U.S. is around $6,000.
- In the UK, couples typically spend £1,800 - £3,000.
- Millennials and Gen Z couples are opting for more budget-friendly rings, spending closer to $2,500 - $4,000.
While the three-month salary rule may work for some, it’s not a one-size-fits-all approach. Instead, let’s explore how to determine the right budget based on your financial situation and priorities.
II. The X-Rule: How to Determine Your Ideal Engagement Ring Budget？
Rather than following a strict three-month rule, you should consider the X-rule, which allows flexibility based on your income, expenses, and personal priorities.
2.1 The X-Rule Explained
The X-rule suggests that the amount you spend on an engagement ring should be:
Where:
- X = Your ideal ring budget
- Monthly Income = Your take-home salary
- Essential Expenses = Rent, bills, debt payments, and necessary spending
- Y = A variable multiplier (1 to 3 months), depending on your financial comfort level
2.2 Choosing the Right Multiplier (Y)
-
1-Month Salary Rule (Conservative Approach)
- Ideal if you have student loans, other financial priorities, or prefer to invest in experiences (e.g., a honeymoon or a home).
- Best for those looking for a beautiful yet budget-friendly ring.
-
2-Month Salary Rule (Balanced Approach)
- Works well if you want a high-quality ring but still prioritize financial security.
- Ideal for those who want to balance affordability and tradition.
-
3-Month Salary Rule (Traditional Approach)
- Best for those who value traditional engagement ring standards and have a comfortable financial situation.
- Ideal if your partner has high expectations for a luxury ring.
By using this formula, you can set a budget that makes sense for your financial situation without unnecessary stress or debt.
III. How to Get the Best Engagement Ring for Your Budget
Regardless of how much you decide to spend, getting the best value is essential. Here are some key factors to consider when shopping for an engagement ring:
3.1 Prioritize the “Four Cs” of Diamonds
When choosing a diamond engagement ring, understanding the Four Cs can help you get the best quality for your budget.
- Carat – The weight of the diamond. Instead of a 1-carat diamond, consider a 0.9-carat to save 15-20% while still looking nearly identical.
- Cut – The most important factor for sparkle. Choose an "Excellent" or "Very Good" cut for maximum brilliance.
- Clarity – Choose VS1 or VS2 diamonds to get a clean look without overpaying for "flawless" clarity.
- Color – Opt for G-H color (near colorless) instead of D-F to save money without noticeable differences.
3.2 Consider Alternative Stones
- Lab-Grown Diamonds – 50-70% cheaper than natural diamonds but visually identical.
- Moissanite – More brilliant than diamonds, highly durable, and much more affordable.
-
Sapphires, Emeralds, or Rubies – Unique, colorful, and often more budget-friendly than diamonds.
3.3 Choose a Budget-Friendly Ring Setting
-
Halo Settings – A small center stone surrounded by smaller diamonds can make the ring appear larger.
- Pavé Bands – Tiny diamonds along the band add extra sparkle without increasing the cost significantly.
- White Gold Instead of Platinum – Looks nearly identical but costs significantly less.
3.4 Buy from Reputable Online Retailers
Buying online from reputable jewelers can save 20-40% compared to traditional stores. Consider retailers like:
- James Allen (HD 360° diamond views)
- Blue Nile (Custom ring builder)
- Brilliant Earth (Ethical and lab-grown diamonds)
IV. Common Mistakes to Avoid When Buying an Engagement Ring
- Going into Debt for the Ring – Avoid financing a ring unless absolutely necessary.
- Not Researching the Four Cs – Educate yourself to avoid overpaying for features that don’t impact beauty.
- Ignoring Your Partner’s Style – Pay attention to their jewelry preferences. Do they prefer vintage, minimalist, or luxury designs?
- Rushing the Purchase – Take time to compare prices, styles, and retailers before making a decision.
Final Thoughts: Spend Smart, Not Just Big
There is no fixed rule for how much you should spend on an engagement ring. Instead of blindly following the three-month salary rule, use the X-rule to determine a budget that fits your income, expenses, and lifestyle.
By focusing on the Four Cs, alternative stones, and budget-friendly settings, you can get a stunning ring without financial stress. Remember, the value of an engagement ring isn’t in its price tag—it’s in the love and commitment it represents.
What do you think about the three-month rule? Would you follow it, or choose your own budget? Let us know in the comments!
